Needing to keep one leg on the floor during sex so you dont spin should qualify for some kind of drunk award.
EVERYONE CAN HEAR YOU FUCKING YOU ARE IN A TENT
What I love about college? The kid tripping balls has a kayak made readily available to him on any given Wednesday, Saturday, or Sunday.
MAYDAY. glass in foot, have crush on guy with mullet.life is over.
I did sing regulators with a random black dude at The Rail without looking at the screen, hugged him and walked off stage. I pretty much live up to all expectations.
This 35 year old just told me that he was headed to the dance floor and it was about to get real dangerous......was that an invite?
You're 34. You can't make guys wait till the third date anymore. Step it up!
Now theyre filling the kiddie pool water with boxes and boxes of jello powder and im not sure if thats a sign i should leave or what
We hooked up with 2 friends last night as always and she stole their fucking cocaine and I just had to drive to their house and make her give it back to him hahshshahahah only me
WHY WONT HOT GETMAN MAKR PUPR WITH ME!!!!???!?!!
Finding an empty bathroom to shit on campus is like the quest for the fucking Holy Grail. Except with more stench and humiliation.
She handed me scissors and told me that they were the ones with the lowest probability of having been used to trim someone's pubes.
I find nice boys who are in extremely long term relationships with nice girls, wait for them to break up, and sneak in for the rebound fucking.
You are like a terrifying jaguar of sex. Predatory.
That man makes my giblets tingle
Congrats? I think?
You can help me! We'll make an occasion of it. Have some rum, make some smores, condemn the email system to the pits of hell...
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