Reminder- he's a douche bag. A big one.
Just saw a drunk guy marching down the strip with a garden rake. I feel compelled to follw him
Just registered some guy for opium withdrawals. WTF opium withdrawals, who does opium anymore.
i really wish james franco would like my vagina
I just smoked pot in front of my old Elementary School. It's like my Childhood and Adulthood are coming together in this awesome thing.
I'm gonna have sex with a woman...help
all of his pictures were taken on a library computer, how did you even consider fucking him?
Was it high me or sober me who put those Jolly Rancher sticks in the freezer? I'd be soooo impressed if it was high me.
Absinthe night with my dad again, I could get used to this being home thing.
She described me as " a caterpillar of adorable quietness that exploded into a slutty butterfly" She definitely nailed it there
Okay I can't even be mad, I'm in mid-plot to hook up with Michael Phelp's third cousin.
Yes she scared me. She had NIPPLE CLAMPS ATTACHED TO A STUN GUN.
The neighbor just yelled bring me back that big red alien penis.
The girl neighbor.
she made me cum so hard I dislocated my jaw. I'm keeping her
We fucked like animals on that lion king beanbag chair that your mom got you for your 10th bday
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