he's afraid if he sleeps with me i'll go all lavender brown on him
he sent me a naked picture of himself. things got awkward really quickly. but on a positive note he shaved his chest
But I thought everyone had breakup sex?
Oh shit. The kids are pole dancing on a broom. It's like I'm seeing my future offspring before my eyes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ill bet we could have atleast fucked a girl who fucked a guy who has fucked tara reid. That's a famous circle right?
I mean, we started to hook up but my asthma attack kind of killed the mood
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
The only funny part about this situation was this morning when they rounded up all the drunks in the ER, piled us into a minivan, then dropped us all off at our houses.
almost got into it with the cashier. bitch dont look at me like that just cuz im only buying wine and icing. ill fight.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is love.
Which part? The alcoholic cupcakes or the lesbian st paddys day party?
Rick Santorum just suspended his campaign. Lets celebrate by watching gay pornography together.
I HAVE NEVER BEEN FRIENDZONED IN MY LIFE AND THIS GIRL IS GOING TO MAKE ME QUESTION EVERYTHING. LIKE A GODDAMN CUNT. A WONDERFUL, BEAUTIFUL, MAJESTIC, LESBIAN CUNT.
Sexting Captain while emailing my eharmony match about my low key weekend is hard.
I passed out in my bed, but woke up on the dog bed,with no pants, snuggling with toilet paper and a bottle of softsoap. Ive hit a new low.
Had to trim my nails cus they got too long to effectively finger myself with
Randomize