I just woke up in my car with half the wedding cake next to me. This will not end well.
margarita wednesday is really going to dip into new year's eve thursday
Just found a keg and a mini-bike in our garage, this couldn't possibly go wrong
His housemate was playing a sad violin solo for me on my way out. God I hate musicians.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
One of my other friends found me and the dog in the back seat of this one guy's car....I don't even know
That is correct. I did in fact somehow pass out in the tanning booth for over an hour. And yes the attendant did have to open it up and shake me awake.
There are cops on horseback in our back yard
Remember that time i gave you head on MY birthday and you made me stop so you could watch the rhino part in 300
And that's why we do second round interviews for possible roommates.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I did my patriotic duty. I woke up next to a veteran this morning.
Maybe I'm not hungover. Maybe I'm actually dying.
CyberMonday=Bulk Condom Shopping For 2018
I JUST PETTED A FUCKING SQUIRREL. A SQUIRREL.
He's making me do the dishes for the next month and half because I shit in the bath tub...
Someone sitting next to me at this football game is totally eating chicken nuggets out of his pocket and drinking four loko. I wanna be him.
Randomize