i miss you so much
i miss you too
oops, did i send that to you? i meant to send it to the money you owe me
i wish i could watch tv and lissten to music at the same time...but still understand both
i think otters can do that
you threw up in the oven last night. i found that out after i preheated it to cook a pizza.
Just thought you should know in my puerto rico drunkenness yesterday I signed my dogs name on the bar tab. cruise = success
No, we talked about it. They're cool with me living here as long as I sleep with them both.
You're a rent hooker.
And on the subject of embracing my inner whore, I had two different dicks in my mouth yesterday. Friend, it's official. I'm completely outta control.
If you wondered to yourself today, "did Sarah break her bathing suit strap and flash a pool full of children," the answer is yes.
Why is there a video on my phone of us trying to snort a line of Reeces Pieces with you chanting "This is how fat girls party"?
I'm in Starbucks carrying the boxes wine and the hubcap. So many judging looks.
the other day i was so high i found pages and pages of pictures of HD hamburgers and patriotic music. bong rips for merica.
I last recall trying to play piano and asking justin for drugs. I would like to think I then gracefully laid down on the couch and shut my eyes like a sleeping kitten.
I figure I since I made out with him that I at least had to save his number in my phone.
He came into my room last night and started peeing underneath my desk, I told him the bathroom was the next door over.
I am drunk shake weighting right now.
Wrong Cuomo but I had a dream last night in which I was very sexually attracted to Chris
Randomize