oh man you're gonna hate me when you log onto facebook. remember i love you
farters have to be the big spoon...
I am full of burrito and curiosity
he asked me to have sex with him by saying 'take one for the team'. so no we didn't do it.
Since when does sleeping with your RA not result in free meal swipes? I feel so tricked...
What would you say if I got first degree burns on my nipples from drinking coffee topless?
He's coming over for beer and a movie, but I just don't know if he's interested.
Pathetic and sad. I should come over there and fuck both of you just to get the ball rolling.
I got carried to one bar. Got a piggy back ride to the next bar. I was just testing our drinking team for st pattys day to make sure they are able to handle me more drunk than that.
If I had that in my pants Omg I would want a shirt made so everyone knew
Member that time when we got super drunk and had fun and fell in love
I remember it like it was tomorrow.
Be proud. All I did last night was roll around in my nun costume selling drugs. I love Halloween.
I never actually go in the club. I get in line, hit on a chick, and convince her to come drink all she wants for free at my house.
He claimed he was the best ass eater of the south. He was right.
I feel as though I look like a mom with a substance abuse problem
His dick is curly. It's adorable.
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