one two three fourrrrnication!
So I had a Liz Lemon moment today....went to Chipotle to get my "cheer me up" burrito bowl for the 4th time this week and the chipotle guy sighed and said always the same huh?
i find it simply astounding you spelled drunken wrong but pterodactyl right
omg. if hes just gonna get mad everytime i have sex with one of his "friends" then it was never gonna work out
Some one left their pants in the elevator.
So his "youporn" cam totally caught me stealing quesadilla leftovers.
you kept looking at stripers and saying " Go to College"
His apology was sex and a subway sandwich. Strangely, I'm okay with that.
I ate a pepperoni off of someone's floor last night. We need to talk.
He brought me four big burritos and two joints! He can sleep with his bank teller any time he wants!
I didn't want to but I was drunk in a Disney bathroom with her and had a weak moment.
I love you. Go after that dick
So I almost broadcasted the porn from my phone to the boardroom chrome cast
I'll do anything with you, except downhill sports and butt stuff.
I still don’t believe you, the dog DID NOT tear down the shower curtain and shit on the floor.. we found you in the fetal position in the bathroom holding your tequila gun. It was you!
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