I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
I just want you to know the floor between our rooms isnt sound proof "Captain Cock"
Just for the record its a bit awkward when you introduced me to your friends at your house as your brother and then insisted in front of them that I sleep in your bed with you
Like theyre better than no shoes. I'm sitting her balls naked playing xbox in nothing but crocs with the fur
Teenager with grandparents staying in their room: is to blue balls, as parent waiting for teen to come home safe: is to sleep. You will live- love mom
Take a good hard look at your life. And the number of 18-20 year olds that you have made out with in the last 6 months... and then keep doing whatever the fuck you want.
Its not that it wasnt fun. Its just I got a tooth knocked out and that was my second time being arrested this year
DOUBLE NIPPLE PIERCINGS ARE HORRIFYING
my mom tried to talk to me about my drinking, i somehow turned it around on her, now shes going to AA and I'm going to the bar.
Here's to not getting arrested this year on thanksgiving again. Cheers bitches!
An old biker dude just flirted with me at Food City. I enjoyed it. God damn I need to get laid.
How I know that I'm single: when I get a save the date for a wedding & I read "& guest" my first thought was does my bottle of Jack Daniels count.
It's wednesday. OF COURSE HE'S DRUNK.
he took a fucking pitcher of koolaid and vodka to the bath with him... i wake up from my blackout to his roomate screaming cause he spilled it and passed out in the middle of a blood red tub. she thought he killed himself. jesus christ its only the first day of break and i already regret coming home
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