No, don't ignore my call, i just need to know, whats cuter a pig in boots or a miniature horse sitting down..
Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
A squiggle pen was my first vibrator back when I was young. I would lock myself in my bedroom with that thing. Oh to be 8 again.
so he made me dinner last pm @whch point i askd if i could help out. he hands me his fucking laundry and asks me 2 do it
only you. it could only happen to you.
Can the rest of this semester just go by as a montage?
Can't wait to go see my drug dealers baby being born. He rolled all of the "it's a boy" cigars into blunts.
i told him i was allergic to semen. he pulled out an epipen.
You know what, don't say anything. You all made fun on me for saying I would fuck him junior year when he taught us algebra and six years later, HERE I AM.
I mean I'm screaming I love the gays in the middle of Bart so yeah
Saved a second guy who was crying/on the verge of wigging out. Just call me the drug whisperer.
Look, the coffee machine died a noble death. It was the way it would have wanted to go. It was a mercy exploding, really.
Watching a bear prancing around in a tiara is worth a loss of bar time.
AND I woke up to eggs in my bra. Thanks Taco Cabana...
Its safe now. But... Nobody should sleep on my bed tonight.
i just found a pair of your underwear stuffed behind my harry potter books...was that on purpose?
haha no, it was majik
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