ejected that DVD during the department meeting.. it was our porn from last night. I have a new nick-name at work.
What? Cold floors are soothing when you have a hangover. How am I supposed to pass that up. Even if I'm at my parents house
I may be in pain from falling off the roof but getting to the morning roof keg was well worth it.
so why was i the only one who woke up with ham stuck to my ass?
Remember that time we became friends because I shotgunned a Tall Boy in your bathroom?
Those memories are both hazy and awesome.
I feel like someone had their period in my eyes.
I'm sorry I got a little outta control last night.
My only expectation is honesty. And three orgasms every time.
I just blew my weed a kiss
I had to run home with my hands covering my tits this morning. How does this keep happening?
Everyone was in the walk-in getting high, and I had to be all cool. Serving soup and salads. Night manager status doesn't pay enough.
Seriously? People are paying $45 for Surge?!? I've seen better one night stand decisions being made then the choices being made on amazon orders of Surge
Woke up with a $50 attached to my penis with a rubber band..
Sweet. Tell little Richard to buy us a sack and a pizza.
So you're not opposed to us ever having sex again? Because it just seems like such a waste to let a penis like yours go.
He spent ten minutes post bj, limp cock still out, in shock repeating 'best blow job ever'. So yes, yelling I am the penis queen out the car window was justified.
The police officer that arrested me Friday night just bought me a shot
Randomize
