Fell down a spiral staircase. Et tu vodka. Et tu.
the mechanics of walkigng feel weird right now everyone lools like a demon
what does alcohol mean
In less than 24 hrs I went from conversing with Nobel Laureate, to hangover vomiting in front of a drive thru cashier
This stranger told me I should "start playing for the other team" and then continued to talk to me about the joys of being a lesbian
I just used a baby fork as a roach clip. I am totally the cool aunt.
there's an entire drinking game devoted to nobody liking her face
I need to reevaluate. My boss gave me drug money. I overslept on my couch. And I had my student teacher go to McDonald's and get an egg mcmuffin for me.
If you get laid dressed as my dad that makes me extremely uncomfortable
Just Peed in a cup for my country. Fighting the good fight.
No that one bar I got kicked out of got closed so that technically doesn't count
Today one of my patients offered me pot brownies. Medical school worth it. Living the dream.
I am passing the whore torch on to you my friend. Do me proud
Hope you’re getting action boo.
Definitely no. I woke up next to a bag of McDonald's.
I just split a tacobell party box with my boss. 12 tacos. We were equals for a moment.
im pretty sure i tried to use axe body spray to cover up the strong urine smell coming from my jeans. im also pretty sure that it didnt work.
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