I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
saw "Pah-jure" lube. Thought of you. Wearing the same clothes to work tomorrow.
I stayed in, ate a pint of Hagen daas and watched a movie about aids. Soooooooo single.
Your date looks like the Cloverfield monster. good luck.
I have to look really hot tonight because my personality is going to suck.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I attract so much trash. The guy that is engaged and kissed me is here so is his fiancé. I feel likeshw knows and will cut me in the bathroom might happen. If I'm not at the pool tomorrow she has blonde hair and is really flat.
Does boxed wine and camel crushes signify a college date? Lets hope so
Is it sad that I woke up to more "Happy Holidays" texts on 4/20 than I did on Christmas?
I hope so. I just start to question my lifestyle when i pee on coffee tables
thank god my boss can't smell the tequila on my breathe over the phone.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
As long as you're naked and covered in glow paint, I'm there.
I spent the whole weekend building houses out of popsicle sticks for my bowls. How was your weekend?
I vote for a trading skills night. You teach me to juggle, I'll teach you knife fighting, and we'll both learn banjo
my friend was passed out in the bathroom so I threw up in the coffee maker, not the pot the water reservoir that kind of drunk.
You grabbed your house keys, threw them at the door and asked, "did it open?"
He went to 7/11 first and came back with condoms and a banana "in case we get hungry"
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