Sponge bath it is.
He IMed me 5 times, before my homepage even loaded. This is not gonna work out for me
girl next to me is signing up for tough love. definitely getting laid.
they said he just opened the front of his shirt and threw up alll over himself
THEY ARE MY AGE. THEY ARE YOUR LITTLE SISTER'S AGE THIS IS A DELICATE MATTER. CAPS LOCK
Guy next to me is looking up how to press his own ecstasy pills. I'm going to befriend him and see where this goes
sooo....i just remembered that someone fed me a pretzel out of their purse at the bar last night.
we aren't going to have kids. there's a 50% chance that they would look like him. not worth the risk
I kept calling him escargot instead of Estaban..I don't think that was the wisest choice.
She fell down no less than 4 times while we were at the club. One of which was while she was in the bathroom stall next to me.
this dude just showed up to the party with a falcon
They're having lesbian sex while I play super mario world. I hope they like the music
Just spread butter on my bathrobe. This has been an ace morning.
I hope no one at work can tell or smell that I have tequila in my hair and I haven't showered for days
Well Jon got a DUI sleeping in the back seat so I thought the trunk was safer. BUT WHO CARES WHY JUSE PLEASE COME LET ME OUT!
Randomize
