she says her boyfriend and her dignity are both out of town tonight
I always wonder when I meet a guy from online if he needs a moment to mentally register and accept the size of my ass. maybe ill wear a dress.
She had a muffin-top while wearing a one piece bathing suit. Thats gotta break one of newton's laws or something
At what point did we agree that playing bocchi ball on the way to the liquor store was a good idea?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So i was told that i peed in the sink, had sex with a pillow and banged on a washer while singing idian chants
i woke up and the dog was eating spaghetti off my chest.
It's like my ice maker knows when I wanna get drunk
Are you up yet? I really want to know if i tried sleeping in a field... i have the vaguest memory of trying to
Checked my photo vault today... My self nudie folder is passing the 150 mark.
The weird thing is that you don't send them to anyone. You just keep them for yourself...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My neck is PURPLE. This is NOT a good day to be indoctrinated by the cardinal...
Does puke ruin car paint? Good thing it's raining.
I can empathize with sociopaths, serial killers, demons, gods, and monsters....straight white males are literally the only barrier to my 100% empathy rate. I don't get it.
Weird. And pubic lice are now endangered so your hairy balls can rest easy
It doesn't matter if it's only been 3 days since you last changed your sheets. If your fuck buddy comments on how your bed smells like sex, it's time to change them again.
I cant wait to tell our kids we met because you subscribed to my onlyfans.
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