Oh, don't even get me started. Harry Potter is so pure. Twilight is just teenage girl porn.
he asked me to marry him on one of those scrolling message belt buckels.... what now?
your suggestions for charades were, getting sucked into an aircraft turbine, getting raped by a dolphin, and having sex with a vacuum cleaner. you got your own, and actually used a vacuum cleaner as a prop.
The plus side of allergy season is that after our weekend coke binge my runny nose fits right in.
What's he like?
The usual. Sarcastic, dark, full of fucked up emotional problems that result in fantastic sexual prowess.
His band may suck, but it's not like I'm sleeping with all of them.
She washed her feet in the sink at white castle. I want this girl in my life.
Theres dried jager, barbecue sauce and frie remnants all over my front seat.
professor came back from spring break missing a tooth
So here i am dipping ice cream in my vodka and watching the bad girls club on demand. This is not ok
totally just got a week extension on my midterm by telling my prof that I had just found out I was adopted
It's like bringing a chick home from the bar the night before and waking up to thinking you are about to go another round... Just to wake up and find she's already left...
GOT MY PERIOD AND AN INTERNSHIP OFFER THIS IS A WONDERFUL DAY
You mistakenly try to piss in a cactus bush ONE TIME and are forever dubbed cactus ass
My parents left me the house for the weekend...you know what that means?!
Harry Potter marathon and no pants.
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