she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
I'm not really sure how I got home, but judging by this headache, i'm assuming it involved bourbon.
what kind of wine goes with anal sex and shame?
I feel like I'm sitting in a sleigh of puddy. It's not a bathtub though because you need a sleigh to go down a mountain.
Oh god I think I promised some guy from high school that I'd be his fuck buddy in like 3 months
Just saw all the pictures from the party. I'm wearing a different shirt in every single one.
I can't tell which way is up. Too many corners around his house too. An arbitary assimilation of edges.
Christ, I swear you are the high man's Dr. Seuss.
Hope your thanksgiving is a complete blowjob festival.
I dont think ive ever had a drunk day betray me so hard before
Come make me food. I feel like if I go in the kitchen I will just get Gin.. and pass out in there.
He is dating a girl who is on the Olympic shooting team...I've never been so scared to hit on a guy with a girlfriend in my entire life.
That's what every 12 year old basketball team needs; a drunk and hungover lady eating KD whilst cheering them on. Highlight of their lives.
Oh Julie took your pants off last night, I put your pajama bottoms on, and Rachel took your bra off. It takes a village.
In honor of Super Tuesday, we should have the sex tonight.
well, i found him passed out on a picnic table two miles away with a lit cig in his hand...he had a rough night
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