i'm going to rape that little man
omg not your brother
You walked in with a firecracker and a doughnut then demonstrated what a lazy job he did fucking you
He literally is quoting that 21 questions song, the 50 cent one. oh my god.
He told her, Don't talk. Just sit there so I can imagine that you have the kind of personality I wish you had.
I mean, I can get to know him eventually. The time frame doesn't really matter. I'll have sex with him regardless of whether he's interesting or not.
I think the threesome was inevitable when she walked out in nothing but his boxers followed by him completely naked.
Well. I went to a frat party where they mixed gin and Mountain Dew. My kingdom for some olives and vermouth.
So that 100 days of sobriety thing I told you about last week? Lasted all of 4 days. Fuck it, life's too short
I got slapped by a drag queen and bitten on the arm by either a random girl or a weird mouth shaped dog. Tough to tell without seeing the teeth
He has silky zebra print sheets, which you would think he put on just for me, but the bed was unmade. Did I just sleep with a closet case??
I swear to god if you keep eating my cats food drunk I am going to kick you out of our apartment.
THEN YOU WILL NOT GET TO SEE MY TITS TONIGHT OR IN THE NEAR FUTURE YOU HEARTLESS BASTARD
I don't think I'm gonna survive today. I don't remember how to walk. I must crawl 6 blocks to my bed.
Did he at least walk u home
He offered. I dont like that shit. I want his dick not his presence on my walk home
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
Randomize
