let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
I stayed at the bar and helped clean up cause I was told I'd get free shots. Didn't happen.
The guy I wanted to make out with just got beat up, let's roll.
I have jerked off in every room in your house. *the more you know
Quick question, how many times can you get chlamydia before your vagina just gives up and falls off?
Typcal friday morning so far. Puke, shower, commute/puke, coffee, puke, coffee, bagel, good to go. Lunch today?
I'm sorry. I just realized our 'big night out' ended up being you driving my high ass to get burritos and back.
On the 3rd day, she mixed sangria and orange juice and saw that it was good.
BTW I totally understand panda express being popular amongst the highs. I can feel the shrimp being slaughtered in my mouth. It's fantastic.
Oh and I'm kind of in the library.
Waiting for the foreign guy who keeps staring to make his creepy move.
It's official. Those are now your come fuck me flipflops
oh. oh my god. i just had lunch with my mom with semen still on my face.
the quiet that you are hearing is a silent suggestion that you should go fuck yourself
I kind of just assumed by how he whisked eggs that he would be bad in bed.
I've never been so turned off by an omelet.
We just did a u turn on the highway to settle a dispute in a game of slug bug
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