fuck, i never want to drink again I drunk dialed matt last night and broke up with him the second night in a row. FUCK QUADFEST
Hey you
You're the only one I'll text back during sex. what's up?
I'm not working tomorrow. need to take advantage of the last opportunity for weeks of morning sex.
so i was trying to be sexy and unzip his pants with my teeth. i got my lip caught in the zipper and it bled for a good 15 min, totally a mood killer.
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
As we walked into his room, he said welcome to the hurt locker. I should have left, but I love that movie.
You could give me a blowjob later? :)
I meant do something romantic..
Blowjob In the moonlight?
no i decided against it. savin my coke binge for finals week.
Neil John just started open mouth kissing everyone to make sure they are safe.
It sounds like I am drunk, but I am not. I just have a concussion.
LISTEN TO ME! GAY. FIREFIGHTER. They are the most rare and precious kind of gay. The kind little gays dream of. It needs to happen.
I think I'm getting sponsored by the Mexican Drug Cartel for the start of my poker career. It was an interesting night at the bar. One word, Vegas.
Listen. You dont know how advanced you are in yoga till you have to shave your butthole
I don't care. We're going to fuck. And I WONT apologize in the morning. You cheated on me, so you can cheat on her with me.
I passed out in my bed, but woke up on the dog bed,with no pants, snuggling with toilet paper and a bottle of softsoap. Ive hit a new low.
Randomize
