whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
Should I tell Kevin that my finger was in his sister's ass last night?
I'm blazed at jack in the box and my order number is 420. I wish everything in the world made this much sense.
Nothing says Christmas like gin and tears.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh right she's pregnant - that's why all of her statuses have been uber depressing
He told me he's not in to anal. I need to marry him, ASAP.
Well... When your girlfriend fucks your sister, the 2 week courtesy window goes out the door.
Dude, she's the greatest salesman alive. she convinced chelsea to buy a box of Cheerios for $20. She can find your dick some willing pussy.
She was touching herself and looking a shoes online. My debt is bad enough without bringing that hot mess into my life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The bend and snap? 98% success rate of getting attention. When used appropriately, it has an 83% rate of return on a dinner invitation.
Is it just me, or do you see your penis in that hand?
I would use the term shit faced but I'm too polite for that
This guy on the tube is sooooooo high. Eyes are bloodshot and he's licking his headphone cords.
So, I without a doubt haven't used the bag I'm now carrying since we were dating. Just had to discreetly throw out an unopened magnum in a bus station.
Acid king. Jackson puked a lot. Promoter booth. Angry security. No acid. Probably a good thing.
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