Strawberries are so good its weird that food is growable
You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
Vodka and Eggs at 9:30AM = thank you, America.
we fucked the fort apart but we'll rebuild it after we get some drinks.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im in search of the perfect penis, it would be unethical for me not to test run them.
Just pure bliss will emerge from Charles, my tranny bong.
The only thing I accomplished today was naming the bag of wine I've been drinking
You know you drank too much last night when your mouthwash tastes like water
Promise me you will not let me do anything sexual with or to a mini horse no matter how drunk we get. Ever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I made it crystal clear I'm only upset because he's not anywhere fit to be a father of my unborn zygote
well I got an eye infection from a stripper motorboating me but overall it was a great weekend
he pulled my tampon string out with his teeth like a grenade pin yelling frag out! That's why I fuck guys back from deployment. They'll go the distance
IS NO AN EMOTION BECAUSE THAT'S WHAT I'M FEELING RIGHT NOW
You fist bumped my dick last night saying good game. That you'll be back for the 2nd game...
My moral compass kept pointing to his penis.
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