Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
Every good night starts with white castle burgers and shots in the parking lot.
No. I still stand by my previous statement that nachos and tequila is the breakfast of champions.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Even My mom was ashamed of me bringing her home, she pulled me aside, and told me i can do better than, "butter faces"
Want updates from david's night out drinking? If so text back DAVID to this number. Std rates apply.
just shottied a beer can with a pumpkin carver. i love October.
I totally cried the whole time and then screamed out my new therapists name....
Let me be the 15% helpful, 85% useless as shit angel on your shoulder.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah I figured you were blackout when you were Shakira dancing on the floor.
want me to make you a grilled cheese? I can't guarantee it'll be as good as yours but i'll go down on you afterwards if you want
brb printing out this text and putting it on my bedroom wall
You chucked an empty vodka bottle against the wall and yelled "Everyone calm the fuck down, it's just the cops." After 10 seconds of silence I looked over and saw you pissing their fountain.
Next time a random bus filled with santas pulls up to the bar, I'm not getting on it.
Got a $290 noise violation last night for shouting "THE KING OF THE NORTH" til 2 am
MY DINNER LAST NIGHT CONSISTED OF SEMEN AND A PROTEIN SHAKE... MY TRAINER WOULD BE PROUD I DIDN'T HAVE CARBS!
Randomize