did not feel like going to store to get condoms last night so went to her pantry and got a sandwich bag and a rubberband
did it work?
nope
We made a percocet pizza. And then i made an unfortunate decision.
I just made a 90's Nickelodeon TV theme song power hour mix...I don't want to build it up but your head might explode
I dont care about anyone or anything else I just want to make love to you on my air mattress
dude i woke up sitting indian style with my face on the ground and my hand in a bucket of ice.
Climbing through a window thats four feet off the ground isnt the easiest thing when youre high, trust me.
Malt liquor mondays...better in theory.
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
Fastest way to get judgmental looks on a Sunday morning: wear sunglasses inside carrying a case of beer and thin mints at the grocery store. May or may not have ran into the glass door.
Gotta love Minnesota
Her next conquest seems to be stealing her ex-boyfriend's new girlfriend. Pretty sure everyone involved is totally OK with this.
Is it weird that I want to have sex wearing my glasses and lab coat while having an actual scientific discussion?
We had sex during an intermission, then the second period. The bruins better win. Missing a period isn't worth having sex with him
Dude if i sent you a picture of the inside of my fridge would you be able to break down and explain everything that was in it?
I asked him if we could switch positions so I could watch the Olympics... I'd say date number two is a miss
And you were like wow I love water shots they taste so good
Randomize
