did you hook up austin?
No! he threw up in my bathroom, made me wake up and order him jimmy johns, beat my roommate with a macaroni and cheese box, and then passed out with her in her bed
And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
I just want to hang out with her.
You're a liar. Why do I have to give you reasons you can't have sex with my mom? I hate you.
well hello there hangover. fancy meeting you here on this BRIGHT thursday morning.
My grandpa just complimented my boobs. Im taking this as a compliment but also brushing it off as alcoholism on his part.
My wrist bandage is guacamole stained. What an accurate representation of my life as a whole
Yeah, he said he was getting "welcome back Winnipeg Jets drunk" then puked on his jersey.
I just heard "I just let you finger me on Megabus, I clearly don't have standards".
I went to the bathroom, came back, and my friend was sleeping leaning up against the stripper pole.
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
I just threw up vodka and hot dogs in a handicapped stall with someone in it who couldn't make me leave because he couldn't walk.
You can be responsible and still be on that ho life
Couch. On fire.
Dammit. the window insulation sheets are too small for my windows. Yet again I am disappointed by size
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