I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
I wanna dance tonight. i just wanna grind my ass in some man's dick.
Note: footlong is not the password to the subway wi fi network.. p.s- im super high
this is hardly the first time i've been told i'm dressed "too suggestively" for 7 in the morning.
You couldn't stand up so I took you home, took off your makeup, put you to bed then shaved off your eyebrows. I so nearly won the responsible adult prize.
I want to hold her baby but I'm afraid I'll give it a contact buzz
He was dressed in a pink dressing gown feeding people ketamine from a plastic sword he called Excalibur. how was your Monday?
He doesn't belong with God. He belongs face-down in a pile of his own excrement, vomit, blood and semen. Then pissed on by Satan.
never underestimate the power of walking into a bar alone in uv cat makeup.. took home a seven foot man
Dude, I had to stop mid fuck. Her cat was swatting at my balls as I did her from behind. I couldve lost something.
Am I really in your phone as Asshole Jesus??
I really don't think there's anything more liberating than farting.in a loud bar where no one.can.hear you
...I watched him run on the beach yesterday and I think I started ovulating
we had sex in his office so i figured it was appropriate to like his company's page on facebook
Dude no i feel my liver disintegrating
Randomize
