tell her no need for introductions. and that you've read about her on the back of toilet doors.
he wants to bone in the snuggie
Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
there's a taquito in the driveway. If it's not yours I'm going to eat it.
the only reason why im excited to go home for break is to finally eat real fucking food and have normal bowel movements.
Now that the olympics are over we have no excuse for getting belligerently drunk for nationalism every night.
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
A guy just washed his hands in the toilet. No joke
For future reference, Twizzlers CAN leave welts.
When they send me to rehab, I'm screaming your name down the halls.
Literally just saw a 7 year old intently rub his penis on the metro. I'm not ready for this
well i mean, we just followed them into an alien and astronaut party. there was tin foil everywhere
I'm sitting at dinner with my family looking over sexts. The thirst is far too real. They're talking about retail and I'm like haha, yes, you are all correct.
Drinks have officially taken priority over self-respect, and I'm not even all that torn up about it.
How was the tequila? Are you making bad decisions yet?
Randomize
