Raise your hand if you bought 2 annoying girls shots of water. CLOWNS.
I brought my laptop into the bathroom so I can facebook while vomiting. New low?
i'm pretty sure i lost all sex appeal when he caught me peeing in his bushes
and you're not allowed to put a penis in you if it's attached to a 26 year old who works at blockbuster
He went around feeding all the high kids pretzels. He's like their god now
sitting in the bathroom telling some girl to keep puking or she will die. while holding a beer. nursing school rocks.
Wedding cake is always the best dance partner. In the corner. With a jack and coke. And while I'm crying. Listening to "Almost Paradise".
you trust me enough to eiffel tower a girl but don't trust me with a mallet wtf happened to our friendsship
karaoke mosh pit has descended into fisticuffs, send backup
this dude, we had a connection. he kept smiling at me. it's like he knew i was gonna facebook stalk the fuck out of him
My life is literally the worst. I was just laughing so hard at how hot they looked feeding each other the brownies and then I was like DON'T CRY
My roommate just walked in on him eating me out ..happy finals week right?
He's pretending to be my boyfriend so that my family won't bother us when we sneak off to smoke weed
You are the epitome of what awesome would taste like.
What do you want. Tryin to service my husband like the good wife that I am. It is bj Tuesday
Randomize
