used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
just got 3 freshman girls to makeout with each other at a toga party! score!
why is this not a picture message?!?!
The guy drove to our house at 6am to sell us weed. Now that's customer service.
I'm currently using two paint brushes as chopsticks to eat lasagna.... college.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The great thing about skinny blondes is that they're all interchangeable.
Ya, because touching his brother's face for 20 minutes in front of him wasn't bad enough, I also threw up in his garden and stole like 10 of his shirts before I left. But I fed his dog, so it's okay.
Walking into the first day of college is like walking into a meat market. A meat market of sex.
the guy I've been trying to get with saw my brother's genitals before he saw mine, so that's my life.
By far the fardest thing to do drunk is open a band aid
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was giving him a blowjob but we had to stop because he started crying when his cat walked in and started staring at us
What type of bandaid should I use on my clit
Give it up bro. I’m not wearing pants or a bra and only an act of god could change that
I'm not saying you're stupid, just that you have bad luck when thinking...
The closest thing I've had to an orgasm lately is sneezing nonstop from fucking allergies.
it was a 'fall asleep on the bathroom floor after puking bc the cold tile is legit more comfortable than your bed' kind of night.
Randomize