Haha na a cat just ran under your car. Howd that happen?
Probably a woman cat. Doesnt think things through
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
you are the best fuck buddy i could have, all the others get feelings and morals involved
you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
Somebody started a fire in the kitchen. I puked on it till it went out. The firemen high fived me.
I want to say that being forced to stare at the 'no.1 boyfriend' collage behind his head ruined the sex but it just didn't.
Well, a cop just pulled up. This could go either way.
If you fuck her, Im going to call you and I want you to cough 2 times.
We should reintroduce naked Mondays
Apparently while trying to get up from vomiting in the toilet I grabbed the seat cover for leverage and smashed my own head between it and the bowl. I don't remember this.
I was just too high to be in rapids man. I just screamed for the entire time I was jostling about.
but they dont look like handprints. looks like someone had a boxing match with my tits and my tits lost
Note to self don't give these guys your number. I've seen more dick tonight than a proctologist sees his whole career
Because drinking and showering don't go hand in hand. There that's my PSA of the day.
I hope you have irresponsible drunk insurance because you're about to pay a deductible
Randomize
