now i know why they say having sex with her is the equivalent to licking a pay phone
Its already bleeding so dont be alarmed after you bite it
I just smoked pot in front of my old Elementary School. It's like my Childhood and Adulthood are coming together in this awesome thing.
So you threw a sword at me last night
I honestly wish I could say that I was surprised.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she was laying naked in the stream looking for "ribbays", which is apparently drunk for frogs.
hey this is Madison. you gave me your number last night and asked me to remind you that you didn't fuck anyone. you okay?
She liked to slap me in the face while she was on top. All I can say is that big boobs can excuse a lot.
At this point the smell of shame has become my natural musk
IF HE CAN'T EVEN MAKE EYE CONTACT IN CLASS, I DOUBT THERE WILL BE OTHER FORMS OF CONTACT ON OUR FIRST NOT-A-DATE DATE
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm seeing how long I can hold this wine in my mouth. I have so many adventures! I'm like Teddy Ruxpin!
It's only slutty if you don't have his number. Unless there's a full moon. Then anything goes.
There is someone hissing in the hallway. Not even a typo. Not pissing. Hissing. Like a large cat. Or a komodo dragon.
His dick is as big as my 7" heels... Awkwardness is forgotten.
How'd the date with the redheaded dentist go?
She didn't like my gingervitis joke
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
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