omg... punch me in the throat... I am about to lose my mind with my parents.. I'm not saying I agree with the menendez brothers.. but I understand
i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
I feel like I got hit by a truck made out of Jack Daniels.
i used baking grease as lip gloss
We need a plan...
Find random men. Use them as sexual objects. There's our plan.
I feel like tequila heightens the sense of my nipples.
I was an emotional waste case that night. She made me stroke her ponytail.
okay, please tell me Cammy is the one who put the picture and note on my desk saying "beat off to this homeboy"
It's not that I'm in love with her, so much as I would love to be her lesbian experience.
THINK! exactly how many raw eggs did you color and hide in my apt.
Our first crop came in on the day that they added Hercules to Netflix Instant, I think it's the universe telling us that it approves of us growing shrooms in our guest room.
I have to make calls today at work. So I'm gonna call your phone and leave some random messages. Just delete them.
She asked what a chaser is. I died a little inside, please come back..
she was sitting on the toilet asking for me to take a "cute facebook profile picture" for her
I just passed a lady driving with a cat in a sweater sitting on her lap with its paws on the steering wheel
Only you....
Randomize
