im glad we only fight about serious things like the hills and disney scene it
No. He just yelled "youre having one more orgasm!" So he made that happen and then he rolled over and went to sleep.
When I sent you a text telling you to splash water on your face, you texted me back with 'Iwehre N qyull.'
Apple trackpads and semen don't mix. On the way to the Apple Store.
Tell him I thought his Superman stand on your bed and cum all over your back was quite funny
Theres a guy in your room wearing a franzi box costume and some girl is in the box giving him head.
Our neighbors just passed us a blunt from their deck, and are hooking us up.
I just baked them cookies. We're friends now.
Ok wear gym clothes just in case we feel like going shitfaced to the gym
But seriously, I hug most of my drug dealers.
It was a great idea until we got stuck in a ditch. We had to call redneck cousin 1
I feel like at this point in my life I should be dating someone who doesn't run out of all his money on Mondays and have to wait til fridy to buy his weed
I was proudly and successfully the first girl ever to get kicked out of a the bar for being too drunk last night. Loving spring break.
I may have just tried to argue quantum entanglement as the reason I was still in her bed.
It's the kind of dick you travel across the country for
Hey, sorry I choked you last night... I was just really excited to see you.
Randomize
