You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
Hey sorry about saying i hated you. it was the coke and the ice cream.
you turned your livingroom into a bong?
I hate it when I can only see straight when I close one eye. I feel like that deserts the purpose of seeing with two eyes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
her tits were misleading. turns out she wasn't cool, smart and funny
Apparently I kept telling the bartender that I was going to set the Guinness World Record.
Imagine a baby lion feeding on an injured gazelle and it tasting fresh blood for the first time. That's me and this breakfast sammich
That girl from the bar sent me a text saying that she wants to wear my cock as a hat. A cock hat. Is that good or bad?
Remember that time i gave you head on MY birthday and you made me stop so you could watch the rhino part in 300
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Calling a preemptive no homo on tonight's activities
are you just inviting me because you can't afford an actual stripper?
I just spent a solid 3 minutes trying to figure out how to send a smell through my phone
2013: the year of legs covered in hair and pregnancy scares.
if a CSI technician examined our hotel room with a black light he'd think we hit the Pulse button a DNA blender without a lid
My heart says buy the granny panties, but my vagina says don't throw in the towel yet.
Randomize