His pubic hair was longer than his dick
Nothing better then your mother meeting someone you randomly had sex with and him introducing himself as the guy who rocked her world once.
Just saw the liqour store owner get into a mercedes, almost proud to be responsible for that
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
He bought me shots at the bar as his way of of paying me back for Plan B
Drinking vodka straight from my water bottle because of the debate. I just need to forget.
Id fuck him but only at his house and he had to stay im bed till i left. He only works upper body. It just creeps me out how tiny his legs are
Don't be embarrassed its me, I've licked your taint.
I just tried to order ice cream on my bagel. I think I should just call it
Beans, may the odds of a nip slip and drunken make out session be ever in your favor
She said "I feel like I haven't reached my full potential" and I couldn't figure if she meant in life or with the weed..
Hypothetically speaking, when I get a sugar glider would it be frowned upon to bring it Ito classes with me in m pocket?
"Let's do body shots off the freshmen" is officially the worst thing I've ever said.
Earlier today I was eating cookie dough from a tube, now I'm laying naked next to a hot guy watching Pawn Stars in between orgasms. You really can have it all.
Like sorry your dick won’t suck itself?
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