No. I broke it. Note to self, never take a shower with your phone in your pocket.
we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
no one will drink with you if you continue to listen to beyonce
Pot didnt help. Now Im even sadder but now im afraid of the clouds and the crickets.
i can tell by the sound of your bed that he isnt that good at sex.
HOW LONG TILL THESE DRUGS WEAR OFF. I WORK IN ONE HOUR, I REPEAT, I WORK IN ONE HOUR.
It was relaxing until your penis crawled in my ear.
With a few pieces of metal and duct tape and a bong was created
It's like the blind leading the senile over here.
UPDATE: shit just got real- grandma is threatening to beat grandpa with a wooden spoon covered in chili.
The problem with having sex on the couch is that your blanket ends up in the laundry and you're left cold on the couch the next day.
Omg one of the midgets from last night just added me to Facebook.
I'm sending midget strippers dressed as bull fighters with mini bottles of 1800 to your house. Already made the call. Jer is going halves on it. Can't be stopped! Won't be stopped!
this is the last time i am going to a 7am booty call
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
I was afraid I was gonna get a URI, so I peed on his front porch.
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