new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
glow-in-the-dark stars on his ceiling from '98 totally make blowing him more romantic.
Well, I didn't bring a notebook or any paper to class. Should I take notes on the sugar packet, lace thong, or condom wrapper that instead are in my school bag?
Only time i ever look at my online banking statement is to see when i left the bar.
seriously when did my vagina become a soup kitchen for the poor
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
captain cockblock got me again last night so i put a squirrel in his room and jamed the door shut
If i still have my costume on when i get home from the bar i am gonna be pissed
I figured working in my office on the 34th floor I'd be safe railing xanax off my desk. Of course, I snort it just in time for the window washer guy to give me a thumbs up.
The joke is on me because whale penis is forever in my search history.
Worth it.
These last 48 hours have just been about deleting my most recent snap story
The impromptu 'dance party' was just three white dudes flailing arrhythmically in the kitchen in absolute silence. Stone cold sober.
He didn't even get to the first chorus of Hotel California before he started convulsing on top of me.
That makes sense.. A good Bj is a trump card in any argument
I've been sober for almost two weeks and it's been the worst two weeks ever. Even my mom told me I need to start drinking again.
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