Do you know that poor pathetic girl that we should be friends with
apparently i peed in my fridge last night because my vegetable drawer was filled with it.
we were making out and he got up to change his pants. I wonder what would happen if i took my shirt off.
after the first, "yea you like that baby", i quickly remembered why i had stopped having sex with him.
All I remember from my 21st is crying because the bouncer made him put his shirt back on
It's not fair. Guys with dicks that huge should not be allowed to be catholic.
Lil wasted at a baby shower. Here's to beating teen pregnancy BOTTOMS UP
I just want to fuck you then discuss implications of our existence afterwards. Then Doritos and hot tub.
You are so lucky you didn't go back to Tate's house. They decided to figure out who had the biggest balls... I was the judge
I've been up for almost three hours and it took me until JUST NOW to figure out that what I'm tasting isn't blood, just the minerals in the water. Fuck hangovers, man.
I'd cum for enchiladas.
Every time I start to think he's just not worth the trouble, he puts his face down there and I wanna buy him a car
My cousin was arrested on a class b felony for selling meth out of the back door of McDonald's where he worked. Apparently it was the extra special sauce.
It was a career choice to be sure... Mistakes were made.
I might have to quit marching band. It's affecting my drinking schedule
I'm basically doing the Walk of Shame without the added bonus of having sex last night. That doesn't look good on anyone.
Randomize
