You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
she definitely has that "I'll bang you, but then I'll tell your girlfriend" look to her.
best thing about halloween? there are pumpkins to puke in EVERYWHERE!
so exactly how many freshman chicks did i tell to call me "the tripod"?
I mean we havent seen each other since december and then bam its cinco de mayo and were having sex under a life guard tower taking tequila shots between each position. no big deal
How was the bike ride?
Nope. High in the basement. Fruit cups.
This is davidson friend mat i an drunk. Thank you for having a physical relationship. With David. I bet he gas a penis the size of an elephant tusk. You are a lucky lady.
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when i get back.
I NEED ANOTHER LEVEL OF CAPS TO EXPRESS TO YOU THE MAGNITUDE OF MY FADDEDNESS
he said good things come in small packages and I decided to hook up with someone else
They tried to dine n dash at dennys and the waiter jumped on their car and broke their windshield
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
UGH I HATE BEING THIS WAY IM GOING TO GO HUG THE CACTUS YOU GOT ME
She said she was sorry for rolling around in her own vomit. Honestly, I thought it really added to the party.
Then you fell out of your chair, looked right at me and said, "You are sooo drunk."
Randomize
