To think... Somewhere, too drunk by buckcherry is someone's theme song
I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
they have pregnancy tests at the dollar store
I feel like that is one of those things that you should not cheap out on.
SHE has hooked up with both me and my sister. I don't even know what to say. If she goes for my parents next I may have to kill her
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just beat off to internet porn while talking to my mom on the phone and eating a cinnamon roll. U have 5 minutes to get on my level
I'm one ex away from doing an entire victory lap of all of the guys I've hooked up with since second semester of freshman year. Single me is scary.
Also, you peed on your hand last night. Id just like to point that out
Plan: drunk dancing. Reality: drunk almost getting in fights with people that could beat me into the ground.
Life Lesson #1 of 2013: double-fisting shower beers and shaving my bikini line should be reserved for two different showers.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm pretty sure that our Lady and The Tramp Red Vine moment was the farthest I got last night
I told you I missed you and you said you missed me as much as you miss a urinary tract infection. I get it. You're still mad.
Oh dear. Sending much love.
Just send a machete.
it's unicorns you uncultured swine
I'm at a sex party and there's a guy in an ICP jersey and trip pants. I see now that this is the moment in the movie of my life I recognize I have a problem
I woke up with a shot glass nestled between my boobs like a baby bird.
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