I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
New Low: Just set a reminder on my phone for me to check on things I need to harvest late on Farmville.
9 am. shotgunning while conditioning my hair. i love college football season.
guess where i woke up this morning? If you guessed the hospital, you sir are correct.
Talking her gay man friend into dancing with me officially makes me the world's best wingman. ever.
Tequila bombs in champagne seemed like a good idea at the time.
Im having a christmas reunion party tonight. Last year i ate my own contact. We'll see how this year goes
im at work. we just had a random 14-year-old amish girl come in and gift us with cinnamon rolls as thanks for letting her use the bathroom. i dont even know.
My internship group is made up of all freshman. Their enthusiasm for education and social interaction sickens me.
I was apparently the best non-Irish person at the party. I wore my skating dress, Austrian flag and a giant shamrock. Everyone is calling me "30 Shots Girl".
Apparently this establishment won't let you rent a sailboat if you have been drinking rum all morning
Like, bro, how do you think I got the idea to go sailing
Look, if this is a cop, just lemme know that Mike is ok. Fuckin all star game
Why did I wake up next to the fire pit? And who wrapped me up like a burrito?
Jägerbombs. Thank Sara.
When you're as high as I am right now brushing your teeth is both magical and fucking terrifying
Best night if my life? Time I got eaten out in the backseat of a M5 while eating White Castle. Then he fucked me. Perfect
Randomize
