Texts From Last Night

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  (248): View more from Michigan

  God I can't wait to have my phone textbombed every night

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  (248): God I can't wait to have my phone textbombed every night http://tfl.nu/0w8x
  Replies (4) Good night (1028) Bad night (509)
• Favorite

  (513): View more from Ohio

  u know u need to get laid when watching mike wazowskis gf from monsters inc makes u horny

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  (513): u know u need to get laid when watching mike wazowskis gf from monsters inc makes u horny http://tfl.nu/3xi0
  Replies (11) Good night (716) Bad night (4216)
• Favorite

  (702): View more from Nevada

  oh hey just found a glowstick in my tits. fuck yes new years eve

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  (702): oh hey just found a glowstick in my tits. fuck yes new years eve http://tfl.nu/2910
  Replies (29) Good night (6096) Bad night (699)
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  (740): View more from Ohio

  you should have seen his reaction to my boobs, it was like he just met god

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  (740): you should have seen his reaction to my boobs, it was like he just met god http://tfl.nu/byer
  Replies (25) Good night (7596) Bad night (1123)
• Favorite

  (251): View more from Alabama

  And when we woke up we made beer pancakes. Great start to a family picture day.

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  (251): And when we woke up we made beer pancakes. Great start to a family picture day. http://tfl.nu/qr88
  Replies (9) Good night (2772) Bad night (763)
• Favorite

  (518): View more from New York

  Every single time I start thinking that we shouldn't have done that to him, I think of his ballsack in our passed out faces. No sympathy.

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  (518): Every single time I start thinking that we shouldn't have done that to him, I think of his ballsack in our passed out faces. No sympathy. http://tfl.nu/6ng1
  Replies (5) Good night (3913) Bad night (892)
• Favorite

  (443): View more from Maryland

  Uh, do you remember who's thong is in my tree?

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  (443): Uh, do you remember who's thong is in my tree? http://tfl.nu/odr7
  Replies (10) Good night (3013) Bad night (977)
• Favorite

  (503): View more from Oregon

  some crying dude holding an empty fifth of burnetts just showed up at our door and asked 'do i live here?'

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  (503): some crying dude holding an empty fifth of burnetts just showed up at our door and asked 'do i live here?' http://tfl.nu/rnao
  Replies (12) Good night (3929) Bad night (1142)
• Favorite

  (228): View more from Mississippi

  Mom brought home a 36 pack of Smirnoff and was all "ring any bells?" and then winked. I'm scared. What does she know?

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  (228): Mom brought home a 36 pack of Smirnoff and was all "ring any bells?" and then winked. I'm scared. What does she know? http://tfl.nu/qpy1
  Replies (10) Good night (1861) Bad night (602)
• Favorite

  (859): View more from Kentucky

  I NEED YOU HERE TO KNOCK THE MALT BEVERAGES OUT OF MY MOUTH

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  (859): I NEED YOU HERE TO KNOCK THE MALT BEVERAGES OUT OF MY MOUTH http://tfl.nu/ebr6
  Replies (1) Good night (782) Bad night (574)
• Favorite

  (802): View more from Vermont

  when the officer asked him if he had been drinking, he just goes, "yeah, you?" then falls onto the table.

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  (802): when the officer asked him if he had been drinking, he just goes, "yeah, you?" then falls onto the table. http://tfl.nu/81fa
  Replies (12) Good night (2359) Bad night (948)
• Favorite

  (704): View more from North Carolina

  His 21st birthday is in the middle of shark week, it's meant to be.

  (336): View more from North Carolina

  You know being hammered seven days in a row can do serious damage to your liver.

  (704): View more from North Carolina

  Text me on Monday and make sure I'm still alive

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  (704): His 21st birthday is in the middle of shark week, it's meant to be. (336): You know being hammered seven days in a row can do serious damage to your liver. (704): Text me on Monday and make sure I'm still alive http://tfl.nu/8bf5
  Replies (7) Good night (1383) Bad night (547)
• Favorite

  (413): View more from Massachusetts

  I KNEW IT. I HAD A FEELING. THIS IS GODS CURSE. BREAK UP WITH A SEX GOD. GET ONE OF HIS PEASANTS.

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  (413): I KNEW IT. I HAD A FEELING. THIS IS GODS CURSE. BREAK UP WITH A SEX GOD. GET ONE OF HIS PEASANTS. http://tfl.nu/290q
  Replies (1) Good night (457) Bad night (841)
• Favorite

  (570): View more from Pennsylvania

  HIS BALLS ARE HEAVEN SENT FROM THE VELVET ANGLES.

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  (570): HIS BALLS ARE HEAVEN SENT FROM THE VELVET ANGLES. http://tfl.nu/3qt3
  Replies (7) Good night (618) Bad night (271)
• Favorite

  (207): View more from Maine

  If I show up to the mall alone looking like I do to purchase a vibrator and some Japanese food, I would judge me too.

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  (207): If I show up to the mall alone looking like I do to purchase a vibrator and some Japanese food, I would judge me too. http://tfl.nu/gosa
  Replies (0) Good night (408) Bad night (725)

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