He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
You just took 4 shots. 2 of them were maple syrup.
I think id rather eat ped egg shavings.
He played with my vagina like it was a turntable
You put your red cup in a chain link fence and kept telling me you could use it as a telescope
once the "do it" chant starts, any shot at an even remotely dignified party experience is dead.
as we were stuffing their 24 of beer into our bags you kept saying you wanted cheese strings. closest things we found were kraft singles. as the guys came up the stairs you kept screaming 'GET THE CHEESE! GET THE CHEESE!'
your ex girlfriend just barged in my house, drunk, mumbled something about "car strip", and put a huge hole in my drywall with her head.
Good thing I took the morning after pill cuz I pretty much had packaged seamen in me like I was a squirrel saving it for later or something
I have fiberglass splinters all over my hands and woke up with a sign that says PUMPKINS in my room.
I just lit a candle in my room using axe and a lighter, that's how bored I am. Let's get schwasted.
Milk that cash cow for all the shots she's worth
Lesson learned. No more vodka and toaster strudel
Sexy intern needs to have caveman sex with me
I never said it was inaccurate, I said I hate you.
Randomize
