I just saw Sharon Stone's cootch in high def. I think I'll stay gay.
what if every blade of grass was a penis?
you came back at 4am in a suit jacket and a half eaten burrito...
in mid cry she says "I can be a whore if I want to"
Also, at 1:30 I emailed myself saying, "are you there Margaret? It's me, god"
i just thought that perhaps i was done with the "boning on someone else's futon" stage of my life. guess not.
It was like the perfect storm of bad decisions.
So I vote that we skip the bowling and just go straight to destroying our livers.
I don't care what you say, the fact that he's a drag queen with the same shoe size as me is reason enough to date him
The dick lei will go down in squad history
How do u explain to your grandma that your relationship status is hooking up with randoms at a bar
You were in no condition to manage a 3-way.
He adjusted my bra straps while I blew him.
Naw dude theres seriously a lobster in my sock drawer. Why?
Wanted to let you know I hooked up with your brother.
i thought he was gay wtf
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