Wouldn't pinatas filled with coke be awesome idea for cinco de mayo?
Sorry I had passed out by this time I think, with the chicken fingers ON my face in my bed, with all the lights on, and ketchup all over.
is it possible i asked you to give me a preliminary pap smear?
we left the music on while we were fucking. some kanye west song started playing and he started to cry
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Rule number one to being a good adult: don't use your vagina as an icebreaker. Just some wisdom I thought I'd pass down from experience.
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
Calm the fuck down fatty, you can add creme de menthe to a vanilla shake any time of the year
Are you kidding me????? How bout, IM SORRY FOR CALLING YOU 16 TIMES AND LEAVING YOU A TWO MINUTE VOICEMAIL OF MYSELF THROWING UP.
Put an egg in my coffee filter this morning. I think I am still drunk.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He came to my Harry Potter marathon wearing a Hogwarts uniform. Of course I fucked him.
Some crack addled fool from the sketch ass motel behind the restaurant just gave me a flyer for an AA group when I was on my smoke break. I don't do mornings
I shaved my asshole for you. You WILL fuck me tonight.
How is it possible for someone who gets so many dick picks sent to her, to be experiencing such a complete and utter lack of dick IRL.
Nothing ruins an orgasm faster than accidentally calling out his boss's name
tell raye i said hi and sorry for bleeding on the limes
Randomize