Pregnant stripper...not hot.
my drunk step mom just informed me my dad likes reverse cowgirl. Please god kill me.
We've made a drinking game out of how many times the tornado sirens go off. We're good at tornado safety.
Your excuse of not making us Mac and cheese was that you couldn't find 6 cups of water...
We broke the shower door. Completely off. His roommates were not happy but I sure was
She barfed in the corner of the baby pool. Then she yelled "it's okay" repeatedly while trying to scoop it out.
The assistant vp has a bottle of wine on his desk & I have a feeling my boobs will be making an appearance today.
His balls looked like two miss shaped chicken nuggets
The bad news is tonight is also a blue moon, ergo, latin, I will have to get 'once in a blue moon' drunk which I feel is significantly more dangerous than IPO drunk
Hello, the Less Drunk that has my sister's phone. I am the Moderately Drunk. I am questioning your Friday activities. Why are you not the More Drunk?
There was just a girl standing next to me on the train, wasted, wearing only one shoe. I so wanted to pat her on the shoulder and say "oh honey, we've all been there"
Well I shit myself on the way home from work today so there's that...
He said he "doesnt care at all, really" if I shave my legs or not. Challenge accepted.
for once I'd like a one night stand where I don't meet the guys mom or wife in the morning
Two old ladies openly mocked me this morning at drunk breakfast. Is it time to reevaluate my life choices?
Randomize
