Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
I'm blazed at jack in the box and my order number is 420. I wish everything in the world made this much sense.
All I did today at work was try to remember in vivid detail what your cock looks like.
take it from a girl who woke up with a girl in her bed... you were not that drunk.
Why does every girl think its ok to cheat on their boyfriends with me?
she kept peeing on everything and yelling it was now her property.
just saw a couple drunkenly stumble over to the family planning aisle of Walgreens. inspiring.
Consider it an appointment to improve my blow job capabilities.
I can't even masturbate anymore!! That was my last source of cardio!!
I'm petty sure you said "hold on let me make my nipples hard, they look better"
Nothing ends a night of heavy drinking better than banging to three six mafia in your own driveway
I woke up hugging my purse and I found a business card in my underwear. How?
The cup holder in my recliner holds a whole bottle of wine. That's definitely a sign.
Need a Dr's note to excuse me from blowjobs for 3-6 weeks while my jaw heals..
Our baby is creepy.
That's how we know it's ours. haha
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