Texts From Last Night

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  (732): View more from New Jersey

  fuck the hobbit

  (301): View more from Maryland

  what about unicorns?

  (732): View more from New Jersey

  fuck those pointy horses

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  (732): fuck the hobbit (301): what about unicorns? (732): fuck those pointy horses http://tfl.nu/k7om
  Replies (9) Good night (2849) Bad night (904)
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  (206): View more from Washington

  We walked past a group of guys in front of a bar last night and they claimed, I quote: Wow, we'd actually have to work for that.

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  (206): We walked past a group of guys in front of a bar last night and they claimed, I quote: Wow, we'd actually have to work for that. http://tfl.nu/vyji
  Replies (34) Good night (5425) Bad night (616)
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  (443): View more from Maryland

  told my boyfriend i was a virgin so he wouldnt feel bad since he is. now hes asking why his dick is so itchy. should i tell him why?

  (410): View more from Maryland

  i don't see why you should, it's not like you told the other guys with the itchy dicks.

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  (443): told my boyfriend i was a virgin so he wouldnt feel bad since he is. now hes asking why his dick is so itchy. should i tell him why? (410): i don't see why you should, it's not like you told the other guys with the itchy dicks. http://tfl.nu/uckj
  Replies (63) Good night (824) Bad night (9012)
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  (330): View more from Ohio

  come in to starbucks and ill make you a 4loko latte before theyre banned

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  (330): come in to starbucks and ill make you a 4loko latte before theyre banned http://tfl.nu/3008
  Replies (9) Good night (5484) Bad night (998)
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  (727): View more from Florida

  Hey for future reference vodka can not be substituted for water when shaving your legs

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  (727): Hey for future reference vodka can not be substituted for water when shaving your legs http://tfl.nu/d5ya
  Replies (33) Good night (1181) Bad night (7059)
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  (412): View more from Pennsylvania

  Um he just came into the kitchen naked to get her purse or something?

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  (412): Um he just came into the kitchen naked to get her purse or something? http://tfl.nu/z60e
  Replies (2) Good night (2539) Bad night (840)
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  (402): View more from Nebraska

  Does he not understand that naked slip and slide needs supervision after dark?!

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  (402): Does he not understand that naked slip and slide needs supervision after dark?! http://tfl.nu/bwn3
  Replies (4) Good night (2978) Bad night (1134)
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  (913): View more from Kansas

  You have dresses for different occasions. I need different men's dicks too. It's logic.

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  (913): You have dresses for different occasions. I need different men's dicks too. It's logic. http://tfl.nu/rxwg
  Replies (4) Good night (1196) Bad night (558)
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  (253): View more from Washington

  We were running down las vegas boulevard at 8:30 am with our beers cause we were late for our flight

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  (253): We were running down las vegas boulevard at 8:30 am with our beers cause we were late for our flight http://tfl.nu/nnba
  Replies (18) Good night (1862) Bad night (651)
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  (931): View more from Tennessee

  On the bad side I puked, but on the bright side I puked lettuce which was a new experiance

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  (931): On the bad side I puked, but on the bright side I puked lettuce which was a new experiance http://tfl.nu/e8cg
  Replies (4) Good night (520) Bad night (918)
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  (317): View more from Indiana

  btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.

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  (317): btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets. http://tfl.nu/leo3
  Replies (1) Good night (674) Bad night (325)
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  (713): View more from Texas

  I CAN FEEL MY HEART BEATING MY WHOLE BODY

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  (713): I CAN FEEL MY HEART BEATING MY WHOLE BODY http://tfl.nu/5ce4
  Replies (1) Good night (556) Bad night (313)
• Favorite

  (301): View more from Maryland

  He said he actually "met" me for the first time through a picture his housemate had of me, drunk and passed out in a pool of my own vomit, on the floor of his basement.

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  (301): He said he actually "met" me for the first time through a picture his housemate had of me, drunk and passed out in a pool of my own vomit, on the floor of his basement. http://tfl.nu/k539
  Replies (0) Good night (343) Bad night (789)
• Favorite

  (207): View more from Maine

  Yeah. Still not happy that my prof saw a picture of my vag.

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  (207): Yeah. Still not happy that my prof saw a picture of my vag. http://tfl.nu/rx2a
  Replies (4) Good night (327) Bad night (599)
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  (715): View more from Wisconsin

  He was awful. Hubby's was apparently epic. I suck at swinging.

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  (715): He was awful. Hubby's was apparently epic. I suck at swinging. http://tfl.nu/6wih
  Replies (4) Good night (212) Bad night (687)

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