he was terrible at kissing, so i just kept letting him motorboat me. he seemed very pleased with my choice
I have seen more male genitalia at this party tonight than I ever want to see again in my entire life.
Girls night always turns into let's seperate and get laid night.
Slutapocalypse this thursday. Invite every freshieee you hooked up with this semester to my house. Think of it like a meet n greet for them and battle of the sluts for us.
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Balls are wasted. Waste are ballsted. Ballsd wasted
You scratched my dick last night. It deserves an apology and I fell that actions speak louder than words when it comes to apologies like this.
All I know is she had me sitting on the kitchen floor with her little Pomeranian eating potato chips And shredded cheese. I don't even know dude. I don't even know.
I puked on myself in front of a customer. all. over. myself. thanks Saturday nights
Dude. The only thing that I use less than my dick is my tennis racket. We need to play.
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Can I also remind you that we insisted on touching his mustache?
Well of course I remember it took up like 20 minutes of my night.
I got head this morning from the 31-year-old version of Jenn. It was like a blow job from the future while a simultaneous blast from the past for 10 minutes.
I just sent you a multitude of sexual pictures...and you responded with a Charles Dickens Quote.
I guess that's what I get for clicking on a link that says clown penis.
So we decided we're going to stop having sex...except for tonight. And probably tomorrow.
so he's a sleeptalker.
"Mitochondria is the powerhouse of the cell" right in my ear. 2 am.