Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
If Curt Schilling could pitch a game with that blood-filled sock... if Tiger Woods won the 2008 US Open with a torn ligament, then I'd be an embarrassment to the human race if I couldn't manage to at least jerk him off even if I was still crying after he put it in my butt.
its not like she's the last girl on the planet with symmetrical breasts and great skin
there is no amount of schooling that prepares you for when your morbidly obese 45 year old patient tells you she has her clit pierced.
we're going to drop off one of our cars at the police station tonight so we'll be able to drive home in the morning
I gave up on alcohol forever for like 2 hours, that's got to be a new record
okay have fun. but Under NO circumstances ever attempt to outdrink the german exchange student. no matter how badly you want to blow him. just don't.
Bro, did you watch that scooby doo porn I sent to you?
we're all going for beer and wings at 7. inflate your girlfriend and bring her along too.
I wore wrist and ankle weights while we had sex. Does that count as working out?
well at least now you can say you got an STD from the frontman of a band no one's heard of
fuck you.
We need to talk about your improper dealings with the town drug dealer.
I know. His dick was small at the top and got bigger at the bottom, like a fucking curling wand.
I need to get all the one night tinders in my system before I move back in with my parents
I am getting off work an hour early just to watch you drink. Never let it be said that I don't love you.
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