He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
have you ever noticed that homeless people never have acne. suck it proactive
I thought at least he would want to exchange numbers after he tried to put it in my bum
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
i don't even want to say how many boners i've caused this week
Peach margaritas. And fuck whatever you're about to say, the girl to guy ratio is like 6:1. I need those odds
If I have to take him to the hospital, I'm drawing dicks on his face
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
sorry can't make it tonight, greg's getting back from italy. he's had two weeks of carbs and no gym; now's my chance to get myself a piece of that newly-fat, low self-esteemed ass.
She may be a slut, but at least she's a dedicated slut. She's always super tan and has her shit shaved in really cool designs.
Hes a nice guy and all but I'm only interested in his drunken alter ego.
It was weird, because he kept shaking his head like he was motorboating me...but on my vagina.
You know, I think I'm going to rock the shit out of this whole mid-twenties thing. Fuck babies and weddings -- I have vodka and young cock.
Is using La Croix as a mixer for vodka a legit way to reach my daily water consumption?
i passed out in front of ihop...for the second night in a row. i think i need to reevaluate my life choices
Randomize
