he whispered in my ear that he would be upstairs and i should come up. i stayed downstairs. he came back down and repeated to whisper in my ear. this happened about 5 times until he passed out.
At least we don't have one night stands
True that. We sink our claws in our men.
She woke up 3 seperate times, each time she had a look of pure terror on her face, she had no clue where she was.
There was a suspicious looking plate that suggests I may have eaten salad with gravy
Just puked up hair, tacos and vodka. Hello Memorial Day weekend.
Did I send you an asleep facebook message about the upcoming football season titled 'BRILLIANT' at 4:45 this morning?
It's a gift. Kind of like morning wood in my brain.
He wants a "vagina fling" before he commits to dick for life. I'm gonna allow it.
I think 2012 will be the year I purposely put myself in awkward situations. Much like 2011 but really trying this time. Like fucking the little sister of a girl I already fucked and dating a chick that lives with her ex. It could be awesome or horrible.
I've been at work 30 min broke a paper towel holder a chair set a box on fire and fell down twice. Hungover Brian just reached a new level
You grinded and hooked up with a middle aged tiger woods look-a-like with manboobs. Tequila isn't for you.
I took so my adderall all I can do is lie on my floor and stare too hard at my hedgehog. He has 42 spines in the dark spot on his shoulder btw.
omg so there's this guy on the roof and he just stripped for no reason and now i think he's making out on the rooftop with some other guy? who are these people
If we're going to communicate going forward, you'll need to be versed in Gillian Anderson.
I am convinced you could sleep through the apocalypse and only wake up because youre hungry & want Dominoes
Randomize
