I'm not conventionally pretty...I'm just crazy
is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
There was something that i liked about you, but you spent it
recess is on disney at 4 in the morning, insomnia has never been so rewarding
I've grown up since last year. I don't give blow jobs as birthday presents anymore.
Needless to say they were not happy to find out that we braided their hair together, when one of them woke up needing to puke bad
Showing up at the grocery store at 5am to have the clerk sprint to the condom cabinet waiving the keys because you told him to hurry it was an emergency
Bro, she used the potato bongs to make French fries after. She's deff a keeper.
i think he spiked my sandwich with a viagra
Apparently, "please don't I have to be in court tomorrow" is not a valid excuse for a girl to abstain from giving a massive hickey.
BTW rolling him off the couch and onto that tarp was pure genius. He definitely pissed himself last night.
I really hope you didn't eat the bowl of melted vanilla ice cream I left on the coffee table. Because it is not melted vanilla ice cream.
I just found a reminder in my phone to ask you about your sex life in 7 years. So how is that going?
Would you consider masturbating to Hocus Pocus an adulthood high or low?
The highlight of my week is I found some hetero porn I didn't completely hate. Branching out.
Randomize
